 |
| From www.foodandculture.wikispaces.com |
In a break with tradition this daddy blogger has been carrying out genuine non-scientific research to prove that despite my protestations to the contrary - mum really does know best!
1. Mums never forget
Mums are born with a brain enhancement called the "store-all" by scientists. This gives them the ability to remember eveything they have ever been told.
- Want to know when Sabrina's birthday is? Ask mum.
- Want to know what grade W got for History 2 years ago last November? Ask mum.
- Want to know when M's follow-up appointment with the orthodontist is? Ask mum.
Dads try very hard to develop the store-all - but it just ain't happening.
2. Mums are better at wrapping up
- Want to give a present that looks good before it is opened?
- Want to give a present that doesn't look like a monkey has been playing football with it?
Ask mum.
It is a scientific fact that dads can't wrap up - we just can't. Our presents always end up scrunched up rather than wrapped up. Whereas mums know what to do with ribbon and never lose the end of a roll of Sellotape.
3. Mums have the better fashion sense
Not sure which colours go together?
Worried about making a fashion faux pas?
Ask mum.
Never ever ask dad or you'll end up with your tights outside your pants and/or a blue/brown clothes combination.
They say that outside appearances don't matter but when you have been dressed by dad, believe me they do!
 |
| By Liz Clayton. From www.falmouth.ac.uk |
4. Mums know that carrots are better for you than chocolate
Looking to fulfill your 5 a day? Want to see in the dark rather than glow in the dark?
Ask mum.
Mums were born knowing that 1 leaf of iceberg lettuce and a glass of Cherry Cola do not constitute 2 of the essential 5.
They know about minerals, fibre and vitamins and do not fear them!
5. Mums smell nicer
This again is a scientific fact. Mums just smell nice.
Ask yourself this question: Who would you prefer to sit next to on a six hour coach journey?
If you possess a sense of smell then you know the answer as the lack of a "stinking after a curry" washed down with a pint of Old Thumper 3 days ago faultline within their genetic mixtape counts very much in a mum's favour.
Speak Soon
JH
My mom has been gone for 3 or so years and I miss her (and my dad) EVERY day for exactly these and other reasons! Well said...or, more accurately, well-written!
ReplyDeleteThankyou for your kind comments and for being my first "comment-er"!
DeleteHey Jez - I have take issue with a couple of points here - however the store all - is without a shadow of a doubt a maternal masterstroke. Yesterday I had to instruct 'Mum' on how to pack a parcel as the post office had refused entry to a mum packed parcel. French mothers and fathers feel chocolate in copious quantities is the ideal start to the day - this morning we had pain au chocolat, washed down with a bowl of chocolat chaud and followed by two children with crepe au nutella.... This is much to the consternation of daddy who frequently gets left with a large bowl of fruit salad to consume over the course of the day as Mother and children feel there are more suitable options involving chocolate to commence the days activities. Dads are also less concerned by outward appearances - and all to the better in my mind for breaking down societal prejudices - although perphaps when I bought the osama bin laden pyjamas and wanted the young boys to wear them on the plane back Mum was perhaps culturally aware enough to deposit them in a local Poubelle.... They do however smell considerably better but their bark is beastly.. Quite the opposite of our dog fortuitously - Tom.
ReplyDeleteThank you for describing me so well ;-))
ReplyDeleteCame over to look at your blog after seeing it featured in today's Dad Bloggers round-up on BritMums. I also had a nosey at your other posts and see you are a history teacher. My son is taking A level history so I know where to come when things get tough. Can you write a post about Churchill please?