When You're There, Be There

The Weekend Picture No. 47

From www.blog.laptopmag.com

I love my iphone and I love my kids.

 

I love spending time with my kids and I am rarely, if ever parted from my iphone.

 

In fact, if I am parted from my iphone then I tend to come out all in a fluster.

 

I am often, on the other hand, parted from my kids. And I am rarely to be found all of a fluster when I am parted from them.

 

As a result, I was challenged this morning by the minister at my church when he relayed some advice he had been given this week.

 

"When you are with your kids, are you really with them? Or is your attention distracted by the device in your pocket/ on your coffee table."

 

That challenged me because I often find myself distracted by emails pinging in, breaking news stories on my Sky News App or by tweets and other equally vital missives from the outside world that have found me because my iphone has made me permanently available. Or rather, because I have allowed my iphone to make me permanently available.

 

So, I have made a pledge. When I am with my kids and my lovely wife my iphone will have to play second fiddle. It may find itself being shut in a drawer or even being switched off.

 

When I am with them - I will really be with them.

 

The outside world can wait.

 

Speak soon

JH

The One With The Cat, The Mountain and The Sick Bowl

THE WEEKEND PICTURE NO. 36

The Signs of Spring before the "Sick Bowl Incident"

We have had an eventful week.

My lovely wife and I are in training for a midsummer charity challenge - the climbing of 24 peaks in 24 hours in order to raise money for the charity Caring Matters Now (click on the links to find out more) - so we planned a fantastic 4 days with friends in Snowdonia National Park where we would climb mountains, chill out with our favourite people and feel much better about the challenge to take place this week.

That didn't happen.

First Murphy the cat got dangerously ill on Sunday night (why do they always get dangerously ill when the regular vet is closed!) - so we had to rush him to the emergency vet in order to pay them as much money as possible and confine him to pussy cat hospital for 3 days. Murphy was so ill that it was possible that we could lose him so the decision was made that I would stay home and look after him once he was allowed out. So, no Snowdonia for me.

Wednesday morning the rest of the family drove off into the distance for 4 days of mountain climbing, chilling and feeling better about things. I retreated into my man cave and waited for news of my furry friend.

Furry friend survived and is now carrying on as if nothing has happened (he doesn't have an overdraft!)

Days 1 and 2 went swimmingly for the lovely wife, the signs of spring and the Dubmeister - a walk up the mountain, lots of chilling and lots of mutual support that the whole challenge wouldn't be so bad after all.

Then came day 3.

Then came the vomiting bug.

The bug which swept through the children like some medieval plague. One by one they fell to the charms of the sick bowl.

Things got so bad that the decision was made to leave 1 day early and so on Friday (just after I had posted my Dad Alone! confession) the call came that they were coming home.

We have spent the weekend feeling sorry for ourselves and wishing that we were as carefree as Murphy, the death cheating feline.

Speak soon

JH

Dad Alone!

Can he survive?

I have been alone since Wednesday morning with nobody but 2 cats and a gang of whistling builders to keep me company.

This experience of solitude has enabled me to ask the question:

How does a Married Dad with Kids (A Madwik) survive without company?

These are the 4 issues you must consider next time you leave your Madwik on his own.

1. The Madwik needs a list

Every time my lovely wife leaves me on my own for more than a few hours I am given a list. As she is away for 4 nights this time I now have a very long list.
Lists are essential for the Madwik because without them we are left to our own devices - and that is a VERY BAD THING!

2. The Madwik has poor time management skills

A Madwik left on his own is very poor at managing his own time - particularly when night falls and the good telly starts. Madwiks can often be seen at way past midnight rubbing the sleep from their eyes as they desparately try to find Dave so that they can chuckle their way through another re-run of Mock The Week.

3. The Madwiks thrive on adrenaline

An impressive by product of the Madwik's cavalier attitude to time management is a phenomenon known as the "Quick hoover and tidy." This phenomenon, which has never been witnessed by any woman ever, is the Madwik at his best. Those of us lucky enough to possess this skill will effortlessly tidy and hoover the house whilst fabricating perfect excuses for not completing the trickier items on the list, before our significant other ends our solitude.

4. Madwiks have little grasp of the rudimentaries of a balanced diet

When a Madwik is left alone they do not eat anything green. They use their new found freedom to eschew the virtues of five a day in favour of foods that come wrapped in cellophane with slogans encouraging the user to enjoy in moderation.

This basic weakness of the Madwik is often spotted by generous females who will offer meals and food parcels in an effort to save the Madwik from themselves.

Speak soon (if I survive!)
JH

PS If you enjoyed this post you might want to read about Why Mums Know Best as well.

How Many Clubs Is Too Many Clubs?

Well rounded or well knackered?

We are great believers in creating well rounded children. We like to think that our three should be equipped with enough strings to their bows to play a decent symphony and as a result we have signed them up for the following:

Swimming lessons, hockey club, netball club, badminton, tennis, scouts and brownies, Youth groups, church groups, cheerleading, cycling, choirs, drama, book clubs and football, piano, recorder, trumpet and clarinet lessons. Then there's gymnastics, board games club and extra maths.

The kids love it all. They love the competition of sport, the camaraderie of music and drama and the stimulation of maths and book clubs.

However, as I drive between clubs and reflect on the rich extra curricular existence of my three children I ask myself: "How many clubs is too many clubs?"

Clubs are expensive

Because it is great to be developing these children of many talents. However, it comes at a cost. We are lucky that a lot of the clubs I have mentioned above are run for free by the schools - however, the clubs that are privately run suck up chunks of our monthly budget at a time.

Clubs are time consuming

Again, other than the clubs that are run by the schools most of these enrichments are a car journey away. On Mondays we juggle netball, brownies and piano. On Thursdays we consume petrol travelling between maths, choir and church youth group. Aside from the cash impact; travelling time tends to be stressful time. Stressful time tends not to be conducive to quality family time.

Clubs feed unlikely dreams

I am sitting beside a swimming pool as I blog this evening marvelling at the progress E has made in the pool since the last time I was here. She can crawl, she can froggy leg and she can even swim on her back - smiling all of the time. And yet, will she be the next Rebecca Adlington? Will she bring home a medal of any colour from any swimming gala ever? Sadly no - so is our money being wasted? Now she can get across a swimming pool without touching the floor when the teacher isn't looking do we really need to keep coming back? Or are we just feeding our own dreams? Wouldn't E and the others benefit more from more chill out time at home or should we persist?

Clubs are unnecessary pressure

Because my concern is that the clubs question is an example of us pushing our children into an early experience of the rat race where they join clubs because that is what children do nowadays. A kick around in the park with your mates bas been replaced by scuba diving classes in the local leisure centre while mum and dad sup lattes in the on site Costa. Leisure time is organised time - are we depriving our children of the opportunity to organise their own free time?

I'd love to know what you think.

Speak soon
JH

I haven't got the time!

No time to cut the grass

Long time no blog!

I spent most of April (when I was on holiday not coincidentally) in a flurry of early blogging enthusiasm. Blogging briefly became my life as I committed time and great effort to the flickering word.

"This blogging lark is easy" I said to myself.

Then I went back to work and came under assault from the daddy blogger's greatest enemy - TIME - or the lack thereof. Suddenly the blog, along with the rest of the bits of my life which didn't begin with a "w" and end with a "k", slipped down to the bottom of the priority list (just like Wolverhampton Wanderers).